You’re Not Alone in Your Pain – by Kind Communication

KindCommunication.orgRe-posted From: http://KindCommunication.org/2014/12/14/youre-not-alone-in-your-pain/

If I am not for myself, who is for me?

If I am only for myself, who am I?

And if not now, when?

-Hillel

I’ve been leading a free Davis Compassionate Communication Practice Group for over two years now.  And I’ve been leading classes in Davis and Sacramento for about as long.  And one thing that I’m always impressed by is the simple healing that happens when people get a chance to merely share their pain with a group, and discover that they are not alone.

I’m in awe when a participant raises their hand, and with tears in their eyes, says “I have so much relief knowing that I am not alone with my pain.  Knowing that others struggle with the same thing I struggle with makes it easier to accept it.”  Whether it’s difficulty accessing and connecting with one’s emotions, accepting their own self unconditionally, or trying to lay aside judgment and blame.

Pain is isolating.  Our culture shames people out of sharing their stories with one another.  Need proof?  What does our culture say about people who are struggling with addictions?  What does our culture say about people who lose their temper, and yell and scream at their family?  What does our culture say about having persistent moods of sadness, anxiety, or anger?

I see our culture labeling these people as having a “problem”.  That there’s something “wrong” and that it “needs to be fixed”.  And when I see depictions in movies or TV shows of people opening up to friends and family about these issues I see two kinds of responses.  ”You need to get help” and “well, let’s take your mind off of it.”

People who struggle with self-acceptance, healing old wounds, processing strong emotions, and being compassionate with others are truly having a human experience.  Recognizing these human experiences as shared experiences opens you up to seeing that life is bigger than just you, that you are connected to a much larger humanity than just yourself.

When you witness the end of someone’s tragic struggle with pain, have you ever thought or asked “why didn’t they tell anyone sooner?”  The answer is probably that they didn’t feel safe to share their pain.

Consider what your knee jerk response would be if a close friend, or family member, said to you “you know, sometimes I just really can’t let go of mistakes I’ve made.  It keeps me up at night, and when I’m alone and thinking about how much I’ve screwed up, I don’t really like myself.”  Or “I just blow up sometimes.  You know I try to avoid fighting; I try to keep my cool most of the time.  But then it just becomes too much and I yell and scream.  I feel really guilty about it.”

Would you respond with listening, showing empathy, inviting the other person to share more about what they’re feeling and what their experience is, and making it clear that you have unconditional acceptance for their experience?

Would you care deeply about them and a desire to help change their experience?  Would you direct them to “get help”, or to take some time to relax and think about something else?  Would you try to reassure them that they are “ok” and that they’re “not that bad”?

Would you be angry and upset with them, disappointed, and inform them of what you expect of them to be doing about their experience?

That first option creates the most safety for people to open up and share.  And if you would do the first option, how do you let people know you’d provide that space for them?  Do you share with others your own pain?  Do you model an awareness of emotions and empathy in even your regular conversation?

For people to feel safe sharing their pain, they need to know it is going to be received with acceptance, compassion, and empathy.

KindCommunication.org is a project by a close friend of Wiki World Order, Alex Leach. WWO fully supports the study, practice, and teaching of non-violent communication as one of the core solutions which already exists.

Tragedy and Hope Media Mail / This Week’s Publications 12.13.2014

Tragedy and HopeRe-posted from the amazing Tragedy and Hope Community, my favorite source for alternative thought and information in the world. Please check it out, sign up, participate, and support today!
TragedyAndHope.ning.com/group/t-h-media-mail-archive/forum/topics/tragedy-and-hope-media-mail-this-week-s-publications-12-13-2014

Tragedy and Hope:

(In Post-Production) T&H: Bill Binney Interview & Mark Passio’s “Demystifying the Occult” seminar in editing stage

(Audio) T&H: Peace Revolution episode 086: Common Sense for the 21st Century

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/TragedyandHope

Recent productions published by independent media affiliates of T&H:

Corbett Report hosted by James Corbett:

(Audio) The Corbett Report interview #978: Geneva Business Insider with David L. Smith

(Audio) The Corbett Report interview #977: Financial Survial: Torture, Terror and Oil

(Audio) The Corbett Report interview #975: Field McConnell Introduces Abel Danger

(Audio) The Corbett Report interview #974: Fairdinkum Radio: Russia, China and Globalization 

(Video & Audio) James Corbett & James Evan Pilato – New World Next Week: Police Paranoia, Ukraine Citizenship, Organic Solution  

(Video, Audio & Transcript) The Corbett Report episode #298: Gladio B and the Battle for Eurasia 

(Audio) The Corbett Report; FLNWO #21 - Tora, Tora, Tora!

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/CorbettReport

Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock:

(Video & Audio) Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock: Keith McAnarchist

(Video & Audio) Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock: Butler Shaffer – James & JoAnne Moriarty

(Video & Audio) Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock: John Kutsch – Orion Martin

(Video & Audio) Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock: Leo Magpoc – Alma Sommer (and Neo) 

(Video & Audio) Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock: Harris Kenny – John Whitehead – Michael Belfiore

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/ErnestHancock 

For more updates/posts:  www.Twitter.com/FreedomsPhoenix

Free Domain Radio hosted by Stefan Molyneux:

(Video) Stefan Molyneux: The Strongest Version of Yourself – Elliott Hulse and Stefan Molyneux

(Video) Stefan Molyneux: The Truth About Eric Garner 

(Video) Stefan Molyneux:  An Introduction to Sophistry  

(Video) Stefan Molyneux: Dr. Nathaniel Branden: A Farewell 

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/StefanMolyneux 

Gnostic Media Podcast hosted by Jan Irvin:

(Video & Audio) Gnostic Media: “The Zionist-CIA Assault on Body and Mind” – Joshua Blakeney interviews Jan Irvin 

(Video & Audio) Gnostic Media: WRC FresnoTV: “What’s In A Name? CIA Weaponized Anthropology, LSD & MKULTRA Mind Control” – Jan Irvin interview  

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/GnosticMedia

Media Monarchy by James Evan Pilato:

(Audio) Media Monarchy: Interview w/ Sargon_Of_Akkad on #GamerGate 

(Audio) Media Monarchy: @PumpUpThaVolume: Episode138 - Farther  

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/MediaMonarchy 

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/PumpUpThaVolume 

Meria Heller Show hosted by Meria Heller:

(Audio) Meria Heller Show: Blood and Guts with Meria and Jack Blood   

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/MeriaHeller

Red Ice Radio hosted by Henrik Palmgren:

(Audio) Red Ice Radio: Christopher Vasey – Hour 1 – Natural Remedies for Inflammation 

(Audio) Red Ice Radio: Kerry Bolton – Hour 1 – The Psychotic Left & The Cycle of Decline 

(Audio) Red Ice Radio: Mike King – Hour 1 – Ferguson: New Norm of Madness & The Hitler-in-Argentina Hoax

(Audio) Red Ice Radio: Anthony Migchels – Hour 1 – Usury: The Problem with the Economic System & Alternative Currencies 

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/RedIceRadio

School Sucks Podcast hosted by Brett Veinotte:

(Audio) School Sucks episode #322: Podcastmasters’ Liberty Master Class – Crypto-Archeology, History and Conspiracy

(Audio) School Sucks episode #321: FREE A/V – The Hidden History of School Sucks Project

(Audio) School Sucks episode #320: Stoicism (2 of 3 – Turning Adversity Into Advantage), With Bill Buppert 

(Audio) School Sucks episode #319: Autonomy Through Agorism (Part 5) – Bitcoin’s Path To Greatness 

(Audio) School Sucks episode #318: Stoicism (1 of 2 – The Practice), With Bill Buppert 

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/SchoolSucksShow 

Tragedy and Hope Media Mail / This Week’s Publications 12.6.2014

Tragedy and HopeRe-posted from the amazing Tragedy and Hope Community, my favorite source for alternative thought and information in the world. Please check it out, sign up, participate, and support today!
TragedyAndHope.ning.com/group/t-h-media-mail-archive/forum/topics/tragedy-and-hope-media-mail-this-week-s-publications-12-06-2014

Tragedy and Hope:

(In Post-Production) T&H: Bill Binney Interview & Mark Passio’s “Demystifying the Occult” seminar in editing stage

(Audio) T&H: Peace Revolution episode 086: Common Sense for the 21st Century

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/TragedyandHope

Recent productions published by independent media affiliates of T&H:

Corbett Report hosted by James Corbett:

(Video, Audio & Transcript) The Corbett Report episode #298: Gladio B and the Battle for Eurasia     

(Video & Audio) The Corbett Report interview #973: Lionel on Media Fakery and Historical Distortion 

(Audio) The Corbett Report interview #972: Financial Survival: Central Asia, Graveyard of Empires?

(Video & Audio) The Corbett Report interview #971: Gladio B Q and A

(Video & Audio) The Corbett Report interview #970: Tjeerd Andringa on Conspiracy and Falsifiability

(Audio) The Corbett Report interview #969: Roundtable with Groningen Students 

(Video & Audio) James Corbett & James Evan Pilato – New World Next Week: Israeli Terrorists vs. Palestinian Rocks 

(Audio) The Corbett Report; FLNWO #21 – Tora, Tora, Tora!

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/CorbettReport

Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock:

(Video & Audio) Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock: Bob Templeton – James & JoAnne Moriarty – James Bovard

(Video & Audio) Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock: Dr. Peter N. Steinmetz – Drew Phillips 

(Video & Audio) Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock: Rodolfo Novak – Angel Clark 

(Video & Audio) Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock: Terry Floyd – Boston T Party

(Video & Audio) Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock: Ernest and Donna Hancock share Thanksgiving 

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/ErnestHancock 

For more updates/posts:  www.Twitter.com/FreedomsPhoenix

Free Domain Radio hosted by Stefan Molyneux:

(Video) Stefan Molyneux:  An Introduction to Sophistry

(Video) Stefan Molyneux: Dr. Nathaniel Branden: A Farewell

(Video) Stefan Molyneux: The Truth About Bill Cosby

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/StefanMolyneux 

Gnostic Media Podcast hosted by Jan Irvin:

(Video & Audio) Gnostic Media episode #219: Dr. Scott Sherr interview -“Hyperberic Oxygen Therapy: Wound Healin… 

(Video & Audio) Gnostic Media episode #218: Kim and Dr. Dave Dortch interview, Pt. 2 – “Nightmare in Murrieta, CA” 

(Article) Gnostic Media – Entheogens: What’s in a Name? The Untold History of Psychedelic Spi…

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/GnosticMedia

Media Monarchy by James Evan Pilato:

(Audio) Media Monarchy: Interview w/ Sargon_Of_Akkad on #GamerGate 

(Audio) Media Monarchy: @PumpUpThaVolume: Episode137 – Never Slow Down  

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/MediaMonarchy 

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/PumpUpThaVolume 

Meria Heller Show hosted by Meria Heller:

(Audio) Meria Heller Show: Blood and Guts with Meria and Jack Blood   

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/MeriaHeller

Red Ice Radio hosted by Henrik Palmgren:

(Audio) Red Ice Radio: Mike King – Hour 1 – Ferguson: New Norm of Madness & The Hitler…

(Audio) Red Ice Radio: Anthony Migchels – Hour 1 – Usury: The Problem with the Economic Sy… 

(Audio) Red Ice Radio: Carlos Morales – Legally Kidnapped: The Case Against Child Protecti…

(Audio) Red Ice Radio: Laurence Easeman – The People vs. The Banks & Russell Brand’s B… 

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/RedIceRadio

School Sucks Podcast hosted by Brett Veinotte:

(Audio) School Sucks episode #321: FREE A/V – The Hidden History of School Sucks Project

(Audio) School Sucks episode #320: Stoicism (2 of 3 – Turning Adversity Into Advantage), With Bill Bup… 

(Audio) School Sucks episode #319: Autonomy Through Agorism (Part 5) – Bitcoin’s Path To Greatness 

(Audio) School Sucks episode #318: Stoicism (1 of 2 – The Practice), With Bill Buppert 

(Audio) School Sucks: Keenevention Media Panel 11-1-14

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/SchoolSucksShow 

Radical Self-Reliance – by Kind Communication

KindCommunication.orgRe-posted From: http://KindCommunication.org/2014/11/29/radical-self-reliance/

If I am not for myself, who is for me?

If I am only for myself, who am I?

And if not now, when?

-Hillel

This is a beautiful riddle by the first century Jewish Rabbi Hillel.  The opening line points us towards a deep truth.  I cannot rely upon others to meet my  needs.  When I make myself totally dependent on the good will (and often clairvoyance) of others, I am giving up my own power of self-reliance.

When you acknowledge that it is your responsibility to take care of your own needs you have power.  You can make choices of who to spend time with and what activities to engage in.  In fact, you are the only one responsible for taking care of your needs.  You may choose to enlist the help of others, and they may agree.  But just because a friend, family member, or partner agrees to help you out doesn’t make them responsible for your happiness and enjoyment of life.  The reason why is within the previous sentence.

It is your happiness and your enjoyment of life which is at stake when your needs are being met or unmet.  Blaming other people for your unhappiness and your lack of enjoyment in life is like thrusting your power into that person’s hands.  You become utterly powerless to help yourself when you’re stuck in the mindset of “it’s his/her fault”.

But before we become lost on the path of being egocentric, confusing that path with the path of self-reliance, Hillel has this second question.  ”If I am only for myself, who am I?”  While it is true that your needs are important, and that you are the only one who is responsible for making sure they are taken care of, it is also true that you do not live in a vacuum.

In fact many of your needs can only be met by being a part of a community of people.  Needs like belonging, community, companionship, and intimacy are all needs that really require being in relationship to other people.  But a one-way relationship is a doomed relationship.  The focus of the relationship can’t just be on one person, relationships needs to be mutual, a two-way street, in order to be sustainable.

So be self-reliant!  Value your needs, and make the choices necessary to ensure your own happiness and enjoyment of life.  No one will make those choices for you.  And be compassionate with others!  Take an interest in contributing to the needs of others, to helping them when they ask for help.  You cannot make it all on your own.

And when is the best time to become self-reliant?  When is the best time to start thinking about the concerns of others?  ”If not now, when?”

KindCommunication.org is a project by a close friend of Wiki World Order, Alex Leach. WWO fully supports the study, practice, and teaching of non-violent communication as one of the core solutions which already exists.

Tragedy and Hope Media Mail / This Week’s Publications 11.29.2014

Tragedy and HopeRe-posted from the amazing Tragedy and Hope Community, my favorite source for alternative thought and information in the world. Please check it out, sign up, participate, and support today!
TragedyAndHope.ning.com/group/t-h-media-mail-archive/forum/topics/tragedy-and-hope-media-mail-this-week-s-publications-11-29-2014

Tragedy and Hope:

(Audio) Peace Revolution episode 086: Common Sense for the 21st Century

(Audio) T&H: Richard Grove on the Meria Heller Show (Oct 29, 2014)

(In Post-Production) T&H: Bill Binney Interview & Mark Passio’s “Demystifying the Occult” seminar in editing stage

(Audio) T&H: Peace Revolution episode 085: The Future of Freedom & the History of Western Civilization

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/TragedyandHope

Recent productions published by independent media affiliates of T&H:

Corbett Report hosted by James Corbett:

(Video) The Corbett Report; We Are Change Rotterdam – Corbett in Groningen on Gladio B, Open Source Investigation, Motivation

(Audio) The Corbett Report; FLNWO #21 - Tora, Tora, Tora!

(Video & Audio) The Corbett Report; Episode #297 - China and the New World Order     

(Video, Audio & Transcript) The Corbett Report; Gladio B: Running Drugs and Laundering Money

(Video, Audio & Transcript) The Corbett Report; Sibel Edmonds Answers Your Questions on Gladio B  

(Video & Audio) James Corbett & James Evan Pilato – New World Next Week: Israeli Terrorists vs. Palestinian Rocks

(Video & Audio) The Corbett Report interview #968: The Asia-Pacific Perspective with Broc West “G20 Brisbane: Police State Lockdown Begins”

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/CorbettReport

Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock:

(Video & Audio) Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock: Ernest and Donna Hancock share Thanksgiving 

(Video & Audio) Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock: Boston T Party – Jerry Day

(Video & Audio) Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock: Pastor Chuck Baldwin – Liberty Fellowship in Kalispell, MT 

(Video & Audio) Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock: Andrea Garcia – Michael Eliot 

(Video & Audio) Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock: Bill Buppert In Studio

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/ErnestHancock 

For more updates/posts:  www.Twitter.com/FreedomsPhoenix

Free Domain Radio hosted by Stefan Molyneux:

(Video) Stefan Molyneux: The Truth About Bill Cosby  

(Video) Stefan Molyneux: The Ferguson Verdict: Propaganda Decoded – Darren Wilson, Michael Brown and Racism

(Video) Stefan Molyneux: Obama’s Executive Order: Immigration, Amnesty and Contradictions 

(Video) Stefan Molyneux: The Fall of Germany. There Will Be No Economic Recovery

(Video) Stefan Molyneux: The Truth About World War I: The Hidden History

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/StefanMolyneux 

Gnostic Media Podcast hosted by Jan Irvin:

(Video & Audio) Gnostic Media episode #219: Dr. Scott Sherr interview -“Hyperberic Oxygen Therapy: Wound Healin… 

(Video & Audio) Gnostic Media episode #218: Kim and Dr. Dave Dortch interview, Pt. 2 – “Nightmare in Murrieta, CA” 

(Article) Gnostic Media – Entheogens: What’s in a Name? The Untold History of Psychedelic Spi…

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/GnosticMedia

Media Monarchy by James Evan Pilato:

(Audio) Media Monarchy: Interview w/ Jay Dyer on ‘Interstellar’

(Audio) Media Monarchy: @PumpUpThaVolume: Episode136 – Glory Days  

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/MediaMonarchy 

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/PumpUpThaVolume 

Meria Heller Show hosted by Meria Heller:

(Audio) Meria Heller Show: Blood and Guts with Meria and Jack Blood   

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/MeriaHeller

Red Ice Radio hosted by Henrik Palmgren:

(Audio) Red Ice Radio: Carlos Morales – Legally Kidnapped: The Case Against Child Protecti…

(Audio) Red Ice Radio: Laurence Easeman – The People vs. The Banks & Russell Brand’s B… 

(Audio) Red Ice Radio: Neil Kramer – Hour 1 – Imperial Culture vs. Tribal Heritage

(Audio) Red Ice Radio: Jason Erb – Hour 1 – Canada’s Identity Crisis 

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/RedIceRadio

School Sucks Podcast hosted by Brett Veinotte:

(Audio) School Sucks episode #320: Stoicism (2 of 3 – Turning Adversity Into Advantage), With Bill Bup… 

(Audio) School Sucks episode #319: Autonomy Through Agorism (Part 5) – Bitcoin’s Path To Greatness 

(Audio) School Sucks episode #318: Stoicism (1 of 2 – The Practice), With Bill Buppert 

(Audio) School Sucks: Keenevention Media Panel 11-1-14

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/SchoolSucksShow 

Tragedy and Hope Media Mail / This Week’s Publications 11.21.2014

Tragedy and HopeRe-posted from the amazing Tragedy and Hope Community, my favorite source for alternative thought and information in the world. Please check it out, sign up, participate, and support today!
TragedyAndHope.ning.com/group/t-h-media-mail-archive/forum/topics/tragedy-and-hope-media-mail-this-week-s-publications-11-21-2014

Tragedy and Hope:

(Audio) Peace Revolution episode 086: Common Sense for the 21st Century

(In Post-Production) T&H: Bill Binney Interview & Mark Passio’s “Demystifying the Occult” seminar in editing stage

(Audio) T&H: Peace Revolution episode 085: The Future of Freedom & the History of Western Civilization

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/TragedyandHope

Recent productions published by independent media affiliates of T&H:

Corbett Report hosted by James Corbett:

(Video) The Corbett Report; See You In Groningen!

(Audio) The Corbett Report; FLNWO #21 – Tora, Tora, Tora!

(Video & Audio) The Corbett Report; Episode #297 – China and the New World Order     

(Video, Audio & Transcript) The Corbett Report; Gladio B: Running Drugs and Laundering Money

(Video, Audio & Transcript) The Corbett Report; Sibel Edmonds Answers Your Questions on Gladio B  

(Video & Audio) James Corbett & James Evan Pilato – New World Next Week: Israeli Terrorists vs. Palestinian Rocks

(Video & Audio) The Corbett Report interview #968: The Asia-Pacific Perspective with Broc West “G20 Brisbane: Police State Lockdown Begins”

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/CorbettReport

Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock:

(Video & Audio) Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock: Cody Wilson – David Wright

(Video & Audio) Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock: Donald Lungrin – Joel Skousen 

(Video & Audio) Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock: Tom Denham – Paul Puey

(Video & Audio) Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock: Paul Rosenberg – Chris Pacea 

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/ErnestHancock 

For more updates/posts:  www.Twitter.com/FreedomsPhoenix

Free Domain Radio hosted by Stefan Molyneux:

(Video) Stefan Molyneux: The Fall of Germany. There Will Be No Economic Recovery

(Video) Stefan Molyneux: Death by Incentives: What Makes The World Go Round  

(Video) Stefan Molyneux: Magic is Madness: An Examination of Fantasy

(Video) Stefan Molyneux: The Truth About World War I: The Hidden History

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/StefanMolyneux 

Gnostic Media Podcast hosted by Jan Irvin:

(Article) Gnostic Media – Entheogens: What’s in a Name? The Untold History of Psychedelic Spi…

(Video & Audio) Gnostic Media episode #218: Kim and Dr. Dave Dortch interview, Pt. 2 – “Nightmare in Murrieta, CA”

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/GnosticMedia

Media Monarchy by James Evan Pilato:

(Audio) Media Monarchy: Interview w/ Jay Dyer on ‘Interstellar’

(Audio) Media Monarchy: @PumpUpThaVolume: Episode135 – How Many Ways  

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/MediaMonarchy 

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/PumpUpThaVolume 

Meria Heller Show hosted by Meria Heller:

(Audio) Meria Heller Show: Roaring Truth with Meria and Jim Fetzer  

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/MeriaHeller

Red Ice Radio hosted by Henrik Palmgren:

(Audio) Red Ice Radio: Jason Erb – Hour 1 – Canada’s Identity Crisis

(Audio) Red Ice Radio: Daniel Hammarberg – Hour 1 – The Madhouse: A Critical Study of Swed… 

(Audio) Red Ice Radio: Arthur Topham – Hour 1 – “Hate Propaganda” Legislation in Canada

(Audio) Red Ice Radio: Brian Hooker – CDC Cover-up of Vaccine & Autism Link

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/RedIceRadio

School Sucks Podcast hosted by Brett Veinotte:

(Audio) School Sucks episode #318: Stoicism (1 of 2 – The Practice), With Bill Buppert 

(Audio) School Sucks: Keenevention Media Panel 11-1-14

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/SchoolSucksShow 

Giving a Stellar Appreciation – by Kind Communication

KindCommunication.orgRe-posted From: http://KindCommunication.org/2014/11/17/giving-a-stellar-appreciation/

Thanksgiving is coming up.  And despite the holiday’s questionable history, it is a day that we are invited as a nation to give thanks.  To give gratitude and appreciation.  But unfortunately most of us don’t know how to give a really stellar appreciation.

Sure we know how to say “thank you”.  The phrase has been drilled into our heads ever since we first learned them.  That same social conditioning has also made those words hollow.  And have you ever noticed how when someone says to you “you’re the best ___!”  or “You are so ____” that the words just seem to bounce off your skin without getting through?   Yeah, it often feels the same way when you say those phrases to others.

But there is a way to give thanks with depth, meaning, and connection.

First, actually identify what you’re thankful for.  When we’re asked “what are you thankful for?” we answer with something vague.  ”My partner”, “my kids”, or “my pets”.  And while you certainly can be thankful that a certain person exists, more often we are thankful for specific things others have done for us.  For if this other person hasn’t every done anything you’re thankful for, then why are you thankful for them?

So get specific about what this other person did that you are thankful for.  Was it something they told you?  Some advice they gave?  Some moment of listening to you deeply?  Was it something they did for you?

Second, how did you feel in that moment?  What emotions come up for you?  Were you joyful, excited, happy, content, relaxed, etc?  Telling the other person your emotional experience opens them up.  It is a moment where you are being vulnerable with who you are, showing yourself to the other.  This invites the other person to take you seriously, to pay attention to what you’re sharing, and to connect.

Third, share with them what value, need, deep concern or desire it met for you.  Did you experience respect, appreciation, love, care, nurture, equality, peace, etc?  What is the value within you that resulted in your emotional experience?  Sharing this lets the other person know why this is important to you.  This can help them see the value in whatever they did or said to you.

Let me leave you an example of this as I give thanks to you the reader:

Thank you for reading this, and any other of my articles you’ve read.  Knowing that people read these articles lets me know that I’m having an opportunity to contribute something, to maybe even help you.  And I feel really excited and pleased about that.  So thank you.

KindCommunication.org is a project by a close friend of Wiki World Order, Alex Leach. WWO fully supports the study, practice, and teaching of non-violent communication as one of the core solutions which already exists.

Tragedy and Hope Media Mail / This Week’s Publications 11.14.2014

Tragedy and HopeRe-posted from the amazing Tragedy and Hope Community, my favorite source for alternative thought and information in the world. Please check it out, sign up, participate, and support today!
TragedyAndHope.ning.com/group/t-h-media-mail-archive/forum/topics/tragedy-and-hope-media-mail-this-week-s-publications-11-14-2014

Tragedy and Hope:

(In Production) Peace Revolution 086: Common Sense for the 21st Century

(Audio) T&H: Richard Grove on the Meria Heller Show (Oct 29, 2014)

(In Post-Production) T&H: Bill Binney Interview & Mark Passio’s “Demystifying the Occult” seminar in editing stage

(Production Update): http://tragedyandhope.ning.com/profiles/blogs/october-24th-production-update-peace-revolution-bill-binney-inter

(Audio) T&H: Peace Revolution episode 085: The Future of Freedom & the History of Western Civilization

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/TragedyandHope

Recent productions published by independent media affiliates of T&H:

Corbett Report hosted by James Corbett:

(Video & Audio) The Corbett Report; Episode #297 – China and the New World Order  

(Video & Audio) James Corbett & James Evan Pilato – New World Next Week: Israeli Terrorists vs. Palestinian Rocks

(Video, Audio & Transcript) The Corbett Report; Gladio B: Running Drugs and Laundering Money

(Video, Audio & Transcript) The Corbett Report; Sibel Edmonds Answers Your Questions on Gladio B  

(Video & Audio) The Corbett Report interview #968: The Asia-Pacific Perspective with Broc West “G20 Brisbane: Police State Lockdown Begins”

(Video) The Corbett Report interview #966: Dan Dicks on The Ottawa Shooting 

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/CorbettReport

Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock:

(Video & Audio) Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock: Brock Lorber

(Video & Audio) Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock: David Hooper – Jeff Berwick – Cody Drummond 

(Video & Audio) Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock: Michael Belfiore – Dr. Peter Steinmetz

(Video & Audio) Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock: Paul Rosenberg – Chris Pacea 

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/ErnestHancock 

For more updates/posts:  www.Twitter.com/FreedomsPhoenix

Free Domain Radio hosted by Stefan Molyneux:

(Video) Stefan Molyneux: The Hidden Dangers of Bitcoin

(Video) Stefan Molyneux: Capitalism vs. The Working Class: Exploitation Examined  

(Video) Stefan Molyneux: The Truth About World War I: The Hidden History

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/StefanMolyneux 

Gnostic Media Podcast hosted by Jan Irvin:

(Article) Gnostic Media – Entheogens: What’s in a Name? The Untold History of Psychedelic Spi…

(Video & Audio) Gnostic Media episode #218: Kim and Dr. Dave Dortch interview, Pt. 2 – “Nightmare in Murrieta, CA”

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/GnosticMedia

Media Monarchy by James Evan Pilato:

(Audio) Media Monarchy: Interview w/ Kristjan Thorsteinson of at FlightPathBook

(Audio) Media Monarchy: @PumpUpThaVolume: Episode134 – Easy Way Out 

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/MediaMonarchy 

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/PumpUpThaVolume 

Meria Heller Show hosted by Meria Heller:

(Audio) Meria Heller Show: Roaring Truth with Meria and Jim Fetzer  

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/MeriaHeller

Red Ice Radio hosted by Henrik Palmgren:

(Audio) Red Ice Radio: Arthur Topham – Hour 1 – “Hate Propaganda” Legislation in Canada

(Audio) Red Ice Radio: Brian Hooker – CDC Cover-up of Vaccine & Autism Link

(Audio) Red Ice Radio: Roger Stone – Hour 1 – Nixon’s Secrets: Untold Truth about Watergat… 

(Audio) Red Ice Radio: Brett Veinotte – Hour 1 – School Sucks: Intelligence & Educatio…  

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/RedIceRadio

School Sucks Podcast hosted by Brett Veinotte:

(Audio) School Sucks: Keenevention Media Panel 11-1-14

(Audio) School Sucks episode #316: (Live): Podcastmasters’ Liberty Master Class – #TurnOutForWhat 

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/SchoolSucksShow 

Tragedy and Hope Media Mail / This Week’s Publications 11.7.2014

Tragedy and HopeRe-posted from the amazing Tragedy and Hope Community, my favorite source for alternative thought and information in the world. Please check it out, sign up, participate, and support today!
TragedyAndHope.ning.com/group/t-h-media-mail-archive/forum/topics/tragedy-and-hope-media-mail-this-week-s-publications-11-07-2014

Tragedy and Hope:

(Audio) T&H: Richard Grove on the Meria Heller Show (Oct 29, 2014)

(In Post-Production) T&H: Bill Binney Interview & Mark Passio’s “Demystifying the Occult” seminar in editing stage

(Production Update): http://tragedyandhope.ning.com/profiles/blogs/october-24th-production-update-peace-revolution-bill-binney-inter

(Audio) T&H: Peace Revolution episode 085: The Future of Freedom & the History of Western Civilization

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/TragedyandHope

 

Recent productions published by independent media affiliates of T&H:

Corbett Report hosted by James Corbett:

(Video & Audio) The Corbett Report; James Corbett Answers Reddit’s Questions  

(Video & Audio) James Corbett & James Evan Pilato – New World Next Week: Israeli Terrorists vs. Palestinian Rocks

(Video, Audio & Transcripts) Gladio B: Protecting Terrorists and Stifling Investigations Part 2

(Video, Audio & Transcripts) Gladio B: From Nationalist Terror to Islamic Terror Part 3

(Audio) The Corbett Report interview #963: The BFP Roundtable on the Marketing of Islamic Terror 

(Audio) The Corbett Report interview #964: Financial Survival: Reality, Perception and Government Lies

(Audio) The Corbett Report interview #965: James Corbett on The Fed, The Petrodollar and The War State 

(Video) The Corbett Report interview #966: Dan Dicks on The Ottawa Shooting 

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/CorbettReport

Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock:

(Video & Audio) Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock: Tony – Pastor Steven Anderson

(Video & Audio) Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock: Ammon Bundy ([son of Cliven Bundy] + BONUS LOADED)

(Video & Audio) Declare Your Independence with Ernest Hancock: Michael w/ MOX News – Alma Sommer – Anthony Miller

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/ErnestHancock

For more updates/posts:  www.Twitter.com/FreedomsPhoenix

Free Domain Radio hosted by Stefan Molyneux:

(Video) Stefan Molyneux: Arguing With Communists: An Examination of Class Systems!

(Video) Stefan Molyneux: Evolution Myths? An Atheist / Christian Debate 

(Video) Stefan Molyneux: MGTOW: Not All Women Are Like That!

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/StefanMolyneux

Gnostic Media Podcast hosted by Jan Irvin:

(Video & Audio) Gnostic Media episode #218: Kim and Dr. Dave Dortch interview, Pt. 2 – “Nightmare in Murrieta, CA”

(Video & Audio) Gnostic Media episode #217: Dr. Kate Rhéaume-Bleue interview – “Vitamin K2 and the Calcium Para…

(Audio) Gnostic Media episode #212: Lenon Honor interview – “9/11 & Cyclical, Fear-Based Mind Contr… 

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/GnosticMedia

Media Monarchy by James Evan Pilato:

(Audio) Media Monarchy: Interview w/ Kristjan Thorsteinson of at FlightPathBook

(Audio) Media Monarchy: @PumpUpThaVolume: Episode133 – Runaway 

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/MediaMonarchy

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/PumpUpThaVolume 

Meria Heller Show hosted by Meria Heller:

(Audio) Meria Heller Show: Richard Grove on the Meria Heller Show (Oct 29, 2014)

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/MeriaHeller

Red Ice Radio hosted by Henrik Palmgren:

(Audio) Red Ice Radio: Tracy Twyman – Hour 1 – Clock Shavings: Demonic Confessions 

(Audio) Red Ice Radio: Brett Veinotte – Hour 1 – School Sucks: Intelligence & Educatio…  

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/RedIceRadio

School Sucks Podcast hosted by Brett Veinotte:

(Audio) School Sucks episode #316: (Live): Podcastmasters’ Liberty Master Class – #TurnOutForWhat 

(Audio) Red Ice Radio: Brett Veinotte – Hour 1 – School Sucks: Intelligence & Educatio…  

For more updates/posts: www.Twitter.com/SchoolSucksShow

Focus on “The Process” more than “The Results” – by Kind Communication

KindCommunication.orgRe-posted From: http://KindCommunication.org/2014/10/16/what-are-you-responsible-for/

Process or results, what do you focus on?

Most of us focus on results.  We live in a culture that really emphasizes results.  Focusing on results means you are focused on the resolution of a problem, or getting what you want accomplished.  Results are tangible things we focus on.

So when you are focused on achieving your preferred resolution, “my partner will start spending more time with me on the weekends”, that is focusing on results.  Another kind of result might be “my parents will accept me for who I am”.  An example of focusing on personal results might be “I will no longer be crippled by anxiety” or “I will love and accept myself fully”.

But you don’t actually have control over these results.  All of them require not only your energy and dedication, but they also require the energy and dedication of others.  They may even require the right set of external circumstances to fall into place before that result will manifest itself.  Even the personal results.

Just to explore this a little further let’s take “I will no longer be crippled by anxiety”.  Not only does that require your own effort, but it may require that you have a supportive network of people in your life.  It may require that you don’t experience any new large traumas in life which leave you with new phobias or fears.  It may also require a change in your environment which may be difficult to pinpoint or difficult to change.  It may even require that you are “in the right place at the right time”, a very mysterious condition indeed.

So when you focus on the results you really are focusing on something that is outside of your personal control.  Process goals on the other hand are things that you actually do have control over.  Focusing on the process means that you are focused on doing what you actually can do to move towards a particular result.

In Nonviolent Communication, we really are focusing on the process rather than the results.  In NVC are goals are “to communicate my feelings and needs/values to this other person”, or “listening to the other with compassion”, or “making requests of the other person”.  This is a challenge to our whole cultural conditioning.  Our culture focuses on getting results.  NVC focuses on doing what you actually can accomplish.  And in doing that you let go of those things you can’t actually control.  All of a sudden your partner’s anger isn’t your responsibility to fix or resolve.  All you can do is either listen to them with empathy, or express to them how you feel and what your needs/values are when they are angry.

This isn’t naive thinking, this is reality.  All that you have control over is how you behave.  And so if you focus on the process, rather than the results, you may find that you have more energy to put into your actions, you have more satisfaction with what happens in life, and that you have less disappointment about unmet expectations.

But that’s not why I wrote this article.  If it was, then this would be a results orientated article.  My process goal in writing this article was to write something that was alive in my heart and mind in this moment.  And I accomplished that process goal.

KindCommunication.org is a project by a close friend of Wiki World Order, Alex Leach. WWO fully supports the study, practice, and teaching of non-violent communication as one of the core solutions which already exists.